Dubstep Ender Fox (annedubstepfox) wrote,
Dubstep Ender Fox

If I Could Make a Hell...

...I would make a hell for my father.

He would be forever tied to a chair and gagged so that he could not speak. This will be symbolic of how trapped I felt as a child and how I could never speak in defense of myself with it being used against me.

Next I would force him to watch both his childhood and mine, side by side, so that he could see that he was repeating the same shit on me.

Then I would turn on a machine that would make him feel the negative and limiting emotions that go surging through me whenever I had to deal with him and the health problems that come with being in constant fight or flight mode.

He would live the nightmare of having his voice caught in his throat and being terrified of the yelling and judgement.

Also, his feet would sit in a bucket of maggots and garbage because that's exactly what he is--maggot infested garbage.

I would also make a hell for the parasite.

For the parasite, solitary confinement and no light source. He would be made to feel all the needs of the living while never dying from the deprivation of said needs. He would have to live in his own shit, piss, and vomit.

Then I would use the same machine as I would do for my father, but the parasite would have to go through the same feelings I had. He would have to feel what his emotional abuse felt like. He would also be made to feel the intensity of the heartbreak that I went through.

I guess all I really want is for these two creatures to understand the depths of pain that I felt and how their actions still haunt me. It won't happen, but if it did, I would be so happy.

Tags: abuse, abusers, heartbreak, humiliation, hurt, the parasite, the snake
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